Strange
by BeggarsCan'tBeChoosers
Summary: Warning: Contains complete crack. And personality switch... And a hella lot of confusion!


"CHICKEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNN!!!!" Italy ran around in circles, flapping his arms. "Germanyyyyyyy! Ve~, we have to eat chicken for tea! No, no! WURST! Get me some wurst immediately, ve~!"

"B-but I spent hours making this pasta for you!" Germany sobbed. "Why don't you appreciate all the work I do for you?"

"Because you are a lazy, lazy boy! And you always run away! NAUGHTY BOY!" Japan clapped above the cowering Germany's head.

"I-I'm sorry I'm a coward, Mister Japan!" He wailed. "I-I don't mean itttt!"

"Don't worry, THE HERO is here!" England kicked down the door, dragging Tony the alien by the hand. America trailed after, sucking his thumb and flinching at every sound. No-one noticed him.

"The hero is nothing, THE AWESOME IS HERE!" Canada swung through a window on a rope, clutching a whimpering Prussia around the waist.

"Please Canada, don't do that, it's scary!" He cried, running to huddle in a corner with Germany the second Canada released him. The brothers hugged each other tightly and blubbered. The author blinked in shock, chugged some more coffee and giggled hysterically.

"DAMNIT BIATCH! Don't sit there crying like a baby! Fetch me a damn cigarette!" Italy waved his arms wildly, before throwing himself in an armchair and commissioning Russia as a footstool. Several of the readers collapsed in shock. One or two muttered about 'OOC' and 'ruining the story'. The author flipped them a V, muttered about how she was far too English, and went back to typing.

"EINS. ZWEI. DREI VIER FUNF!" Austria marched through a hole in the wall in a severe military uniform, glaring at Switzerland, who started crying. Lichtenstein pulled a gun from somewhere and started waving it around and yelling, even as Switzerland fainted.

"Noooooo! Aniki! Leave me aloooooooone, da ze~!" Korea ran through, wailing, with China chasing after him, grinning like a nutter.

"But Korea! Your breasts are mine, aru~!"

"No! They're mine!" Japan shrieked, leaping on China and pimp-slapping him. Korea joined the German brothers in the corner. Someone had made tea and they were sipping it, pinkies out.

"DAMNIT WHERE'S MY WURST?!?" Italy stood up, on poor Russia's back, and pointed at Germany. "DAMNIT YOU COWARDLY PIECE OF CHICKEN POOP! VE~! GET ME MY WURST!"

"R-right away Mister Italy." Germany scuttled off to get it, sobbing the whole way.

"This is ridiculous." Muttered France from a corner, wearing at least eight coats and flinching whenever someone came near him.

"Product of too much sleep pet." The author muttered, tipping a bucket of water over the fainted readers.

"T-too much sleep?" Prussia whimpered. "Too much- aiieeee! Don't hurt me!" He cowered away from Canada, who stood over him, fist raised threateningly.

"Too much sleep." Greece agreed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and hugging a cat close. Everyone looked at him in shock.

"GREECE ISN'T OUT OF CHARACTER!" Russia pointed to him, trembling. Latvia smacked him around the head.

"Shut up, scum. No-one wants to hear your hideous voice." He sneered.

"Da, Mister Latvia. I won't talk anymore, da?" He sniffled, sucking his thumb. Greece smirked, and pulled his jacket open to reveal…

"PLEASE HEAVENS, NO!" Japan shot up from his slumber.

"Hmmm… Whassamatter Kiku?" Greece blinked up, blearily, at his Asian lover. Japan didn't reply, instead shoving a hand down, under the light blankets, groping between the Mediterranean nation's legs. Greece smiled, bemused. "Not that I don't like this forwardness…" He yawned. "But isn't it a bit early love?"

"J-just checking. I- I had a strange dream. I- I apologise!" Japan stuttered, turning bright red. Greece grinned lazily.

"Well you can make a more thorough check later, but right now…" He pulled the smaller man down and nuzzled into him happily, making a soft sound that was almost like purring. Japan raised a cautious hand and petted his lover's hair, before allowing himself to fall back to sleep, content in the larger nation's strong embrace.

**A/N: STFUIHAVENOIDEAI'VEHADSOMUCHSLEEPSRSLY! 12 hours every night for a week T_T THAT'S DOUBLE MY USUAL AMOUNT! *collapses***

**UK: … *prods* … I- almost feel ashamed to admit you are one of mine…**

**US: I'll take her! She drinks too much coffee anyway... Plus she likes McDonalds'! Hell yeah! *punches air***

**UK: … No. Git. She- she drinks tea too!**

**US: *snorts* She's an Iggitarian alright!**

**UK: ... How does that even make sense? Bloody idiot.**

**OTL I worry about myself…**


End file.
